Monday, October 10, 2011

Montek Singh Ahluwalia

Your Tarantula is disappointed like every other true Indian, at today’s announcement of 2011 Sveriges Riksbank Prize in Economic Sciences in Memory of Alfred Nobel, which is often mistakenly referred as Nobel Prize in Economics. While it is unfair to blame Nobel Prize Committee members, one cannot help wondering how our Deputy Chairman of Planning Commission, Montek Singh Ahluwalia missed a berth. Perhaps his nominations missed the deadlines set by the committee and it is the only plausible explanation!

We are all greatly indebted to Motek for his yeomen service to the nation and in particular to all the downtrodden Indians, who unfortunately comprise of nearly 80% of 1.23 billions. Other nations, including the so called advanced countries pay a lip sympathy to those below poverty line, as defined by the respective countries, and some throw alms in the form of social security, health benefit, food coupons and so on as they fancy or deem fit. The simple, untold and least understood Truth is there is no economy without poverty!!! There is hardly any nation which has ever attempted to eradicate the poverty in toto but India nearly achieved it now!

Thus far, no Economist, Politician, or Babu in the world has achieved what Montek did, and that too overnight! It is true that the rest of the world is struggling to define a commonly acceptable definition for Poverty Line (and even re-revised downwards and diluted the proposed definitions ‘n’ number of times to address the political aspirations of the politicians of ‘developing’ nations). Our Montek single handedly achieved the herculean task of lifting few tens of crores (i.e., few hundreds of millions) of Indians above the evasive and elusive poverty line with his super-human effort. The benefited number of Indian people simply outnumber the total combined population of dozens of mid-sized and smaller countries at one go!

On behalf of its readers, your Tarantula strongly commends Montek for Nobel prize in Economics for the year 2012 and he at least deserves the coveted Ig Nobel Prize in 2012.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Rahul Dravid

Indians numbering over 1.21 Billion are obsessed with cricket and think that their heroes SRT, VS, MSD & Prince are Cricket and Cricket is these is players only, in that particular order. Our faith in Cricketing Gods is so unwavering; we continue to worship these national ZEROES and liabilities forever.

Other cricketing nations have different notions. They think Rahul Dravid is the invisible backbone and it is essential to deal with him in fair or foul manner to achieve complete white wash. Those who followed recent Test series, one off T20 and the just concluded first ODI against England cannot ignore the fact there is something very suspicious in the manner Dravid was given out repeatedly.

Recall what Ian Fleming said repeatedly in Goldfinger:

Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action.


Whatever be the BCCI and individual perception on DRS system, the manner in which it is used or otherwise needs a thorough investigation.

The fact that our selectors inducted Dravid into ODI & T20 matches in the ongoing one sided matches in England, despite his retirement from these formats of the international games couple of years ago, is a testimony to Rahul Dravid.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Whitewash


With just concluded 0-4 whitewash in England during cricket test series, our team will be returning home looking very bright and presentable, all set for resuming hectic photo shoots and corporate advertisements that have been awaiting their return. Since this is the first whitewash after a decade plus, our heroes can jump to their primary task without further make-up!

Now that the historic cricket test series against much feared Timbuktu is fast approaching, our selectors have a job on hand. They may find the following suggestions handy:

1. Rahul Dravid should be dropped in the guise of ‘being rested’. He is hardly having any admirers other than rank outsiders Sir Vivian Richards and Steve Waugh. Other than the title ‘wall’ he does not have inspiring prefixes like others do (ex: God, swashbuckling, prince, captain cool, tubunator and so on). What is the point in having a player who stands there forever to save innings-defeats? But for him, India would have achieved much better whitest whitewash of 0-4 Innings plus defeats. He deprived the team of much fresher look. Such dull players have no place in a glorious team like ours.

2. Dhoni should be retained as captain for his record as captain. BCCI should use its muscle to make ICC change rules to have a non-playing captain like in Davis Cup matches so that someone else can bat in his place while, optionally, he can continue to keep wickets. How is that?

3. Swashbucking Sunyawag should be retained as one of the openers for his glorious two one-ball innings in the same Test! Never mind his average in the just concluded series. Future is always bright.

4. Nildulkar, God and hero of 1.21 billion should be a de facto inclusion, as had always been, at least until his grandson plays with him in few Tests. Besides, one day he is bound to get his 100th international hundred. Any number of series losses and becoming a third-rated country are worth it. Who knows it could be against this formidable Timbuktu!

5 to 9. …..

10&11. While the essence of T20 matches lies in the entertainment provided by way of stirp-tease dances on the side lines, Test matches are long drawn (not to be confused with innings defeats) and dull. Hence there is need for entertainment to public and also in dressing room. Who can surpass the combination of bowlers Harbhajan Singh and Srisanth, the best ever Slapper-Slappee?

Saturday, February 5, 2011

WHISTLE-BLOWERS

Long time ago I started to read Sholokhov’s magnum opus And Quiet Flows the Don but some how did not quite finish reading despite its wonderful flow. I guess, without any basis, it tries to summarize that life in a society goes on more or less smoothly despite all the nature and man-made calamities and strong undercurrents which erode the very base on which our life depends. Particularly we Indians enjoy serene life oblivious of mega multi-trillion rupee scams, floods, earth-quakes, daily bandhs and so on. It is very simple to explain some of them: our knowledge of number theory being very peripheral, it is difficult to differentiate the gravity of a 13-digit scam from a 3-digit one. The difference appears to be insignificant. Thus, our life flows quietly!

Whistle-blowers are, positively, a menace to any society. They try to create storm by some revelation and end with a whimper. Not very long ago GOI made a minor mistake of bringing in RTI Act and made a major blunder of giving wide publicity to it. This gave birth to self styled Rights-Activists who started seeking information on anything and everything. This hampers the smooth administration we are accustomed to.

Mother Nature has solution to anything which disturbs its equilibrium. Thus all whistle-blowers and rights-activists meet untimely death sooner than later. Some may say it serves them RIGHT!

It is your Tarantula’s ardent wish to develop a comprehensive database on these two classes of anti-governmental elements and the modality of their untimely death and based on it develop a mathematical model to forecast the number of hours they can hope to survive from the time they blow whistle or file RTI petition, as the case may be. Such a scientific free web-based tool, it is hoped, should be useful to future whistle-blowers/RTI-activists in planning to live their residual life more meaningfully.

There is a brighter side to this, though. As per prevailing rules of life insurance policies, if a holder commits suicide within one year of taking a life policy, it is treated as exclusion and his nominees do not get even a rupee. To circumvent this denial problem, one can blow a whistle (or file an RTI petition) after taking the life policy. Insurer will settle claim very soon even though blowing whistle or filing RTI petition is, by itself, an act of suicide.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Dravidian University

Pardon my ignorance of the very existence of Dravidian University in AP. Even Tarantula which lives, literally and metaphorically, in a corner of a house and derives sustenance through web is not expected to know everything around.

This renowned University is located at a trilingual junction at Kuppam, Chittor Dstrict in the South-Western tip of A.P, which is only 4 kms away from Karnataka, 8 kms from Tamil Nadu and of course very close to Kerala border, which is less than 4.5 hrs drive.

This budding University which is hardly a decade old became an envy of all leading Universities in the world particularly in the last two years when it has awarded 8,000 plus PhDs, which all the eight Ivy Leagues and a few other world’s leading Universities combined could not produce so many PhDs during the same period. It is a great misfortune and a National Tragedy of sort we fail to recognize the yeomen services rendered by this Universities to meet the expected demand for such degree holders. It is a matter of great concern that following news is appearing in headlines:

The A.P state government is Preparing all to cancel 8,029 PhDs awarded by the Dravidian University over the last 2 academic years. Universities like Osmania and Andhra, which have been functioning for decades, registered less than 500 PhDs, the government was shocked that the 10-year-old Dravidian University awarded thousands of PhDs in a single academic year.

Dravidian university has been offering PhDs in Distance education mode against the norms set the UGC and the AICTE and also allowed private institutions to set up study centers to offer MPhil and PhD programmes. The recent norms making M.Phils and PhDs mandatory for appointment as professors and principals in colleges have led to huge demand from students to obtain these qualifications. AP state government had received specific complaints against the university that the study centres were charging `50,000 to `1 lakh for each PhD depending on the subject and its demand.


What is wrong in charging Rs. 1,00,000/- for a PhD when some schools in the Capital of AP, in which this Dravidian University is situated, are charging a minimum of Rs. 6,00,000/- per year for LKG to Class XII (which works out to more than a crore of rupees, if you account interest burden, even if the child fails in his Board exam)? Most parents do shell out more money, ungrudgingly, for a single entrance examination to a private coaching center in twin cities and complain of this University whose Chancellor is none other than the H.E. Governor of AP. Is it not a mockery of Justice?

Readers may refresh their memory by reading the old blog-post:

http://tarantula-political.blogspot.com/2009/09/right-to-get-phd-act.html

Kapil Sibal should explicitly encourage such deemed universities and ensure they do not become doomed and come out with an equation that a charge of Rs. 1,00,000/- for a PhD certificate, in reality, works out to ‘no charge’ just as the loss due to 2G spectrum sale, according to his mathematics, worked out to No Loss.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Ideas from Nature

Ardent admirers of Mother Nature are naïve in some ways. For them, all developments made by homo sapiens have their roots in nature, be it discoveries, inventions, artistic form of expressions like dances, music and so on, sciences and technologies including. At first glance, many examples which readily come to mind appear to strengthen such a view.

Beaver must have given the ideas to build dams; birds must have hardened the human dreams to fly and fish for swimming; fire flies gave idea for lights; serpents and jackals have become a basis to start a class of unique people called politicians; peacock must have given inspiration for dance and some other birds for singing; brilliant scenery made him to capture it on canvas. Bees and ants must have given ideas of forming social systems. Several living creatures must have given early teachings on collective living to human beings. Some birds have given ideas to migrate to other continents. Apple is known to have played a major role in understanding gravity. Bird nests might have given ideas to build early homes; squirrels have given the ideas of warehouses for food storage and rodents gave ideas for tunnels. Examples galore.

Such views look like an expression of rhapsody on nature. That, by no means implies that man had not made any original contributions on his own without leaning on nature for inspiration or catalysts for ideas. Far from it. For instance, the entire technology of spiraling prices is brilliantly conceived by human mind. Many a nation have thrived on early use of such technologies and flourished and many other doomed as well due to consequent runaway inflations and associated manmade disasters. It is worthy to note that one technology derived inspiration from this man-made one and develops space vehicles that go faster than the escape velocity of planets is space technology!

Saturday, November 27, 2010

UIGAC ®

To err is human. We all know that. So is: to sin is more human. Few centuries back there flourished a certain theological institution which permitted any sinner to make confession in a recognized place of worship, draw a cheque for the prescribed sum i.e., not less than the tariff fixed commensurate to the gravity of the offence and carefully put in the drop-box kept aside for the purpose and get absolved through His representative. This system had its virtues. One could murder neighbor or adversary or anyone for that matter – not just one, more if need be – and get His complete absolution on no questions asked basis, get a clean chit from High (note capital h) command, keep head high and live in society, sleep like a baby in the night with ones soul at complete peace with itself.

Extinction of such a wonderful system, or absence of its equivalent, is more acutely felt in today’s society than at any other point in human history. People can manage clean chits from party high command, have the cases withdrawn by CBI in Supreme Court, and ensure that judge uncles rule (for more details read Supreme Court’s remarks on Allahabad High Court made on 26th Oct 2010) in their favor with little or no punishment, get Rathore style smirk back on face, and get respect (!) back from society as though nothing happened but not the baby-like-sleep since the silly thing called conscience still pricks. Offerings like diamond studded golden crown weighing a ton to Lord Balaji coupled with daily dose of sedative pills before going to bed provide no real solace but they do make an avoidable hole in the pocket.

In the aforesaid context, it makes immense business sense to start a Universal Institution to Grant Absolution Certificates and Tarantula is intending to open shortly. All the sinners are encouraged to send their non-refundable remittances directly to the Swiss account of UIGAC® by obtaining the tariffs and bank code for remittances and obtain soft copy of the certificate through 1024-byte state-of-the-art encryption system. All Pakistan printed counterfeit certificates are invalid in His land. Short payments made by incomplete confession are invalid. For example, once a Raja or Raju makes full confessional payment, his kith and kin can enjoy the loot as though it is earned properly in His eyes. Our Certificates are designed for lamination at sinner’s end and can be conveniently kept below the pillow at the time of sleeping. Stolen or Xerox or multiple copies of certificates are invalid. You may note that UIGAC has no braches or representatives in any part of this Universe. Taxes as applicable and other T&C apply.

Those unfortunate few who are yet to sin may send their c.v. for few vacant positions on the board of UIGAC.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Never Too Late


Shri Bholaram Das of Assam made a splash on 16th October 2010 by announcing his enrolment for PhD program in Gauhati University on his 99th Birthday i.e., 100th year of his existence. One of his grand-daughters is going to be his thesis advisor. There is more than one lesson in this communique. Age is no bar for learning though it does not necessarily mean that one should procrastinate basic learning forever. Next lesson is that it does not really matter from whom you learn; at least age-wise i.e., whether it is from someone of grandchild’s age or great-grandchild’s.

From now on, all application forms need to be reprinted to have three boxes to fill-in age as against the current practice of two boxes. In an age where phone numbers are going to become 11 digit long as against present 10 digits and IPv4 IP addresses are being replaced by IPv6, this should have been anticipated. But, that is a minor irritant, to be frank.

In cricketing parlance, nervous nineties is a well known phenomenon. Now that Shri Bholaram is past 99, he need not be nervous at all and during his learning, play his natural game.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Suresh Kalmadi

It is time for all Indians to unite and stand by Suresh Kalmadi on the eve of CWG-2010. He had done a yeomen service to the nation and that needs immediate recognition. All the criticism which is being heaped on him is totally unfair.


Kalmadi is an Indian first. He had a great vision to make India sweep all the medals at CWG without leaving even a single bronze to other countries, possibly without inaugurating the games. He had been planning it for several years and executing with gusto.

Most people from so-called developing nations lack the wonderful immune system we Indians possess. We are immune to anything and everything. Other nations realized their handicap. They are jealous. They cry foul about the conditions in Games village, floods, dengue, falling structures, security and anticipated nation wide riots on or after 24th September 2010 and so on. If they have no such grandiose situations back at their homes, how can India be held responsible?

Has anyone heard of Olympics getting conducted in the Clean Rooms of Silicon Valley? Little bit of dust, aroma and other things will certainly enrich the sporting experience. In the ancient Olympic Games village in Greece there is no evidence of any Glamour Room. Why should we have them in CWG village? Aren’t there enough open spaces in and around CWG village? Man is a product of nature and it is time he comes out of ivory towers and glass houses to freely commune with nature and become an integral part of it.

Well done, Suresh Kalmadi! Keep it up. Ignore your detractors. Aim for Olympics now and make India sweep all medals and take it to Olympic Heights.

Happy Birthday


Coming from an area that has one of the highest infant mortality rates in the world, your Tarantula has every reason to celebrate its one year of survival so far, having announced arrival on blogosphere on 23 September 2009 at 22.30 IST. It happens to be an Equinox day. Does is portend anything? This is 75th baby step in the form of posts in both the Political and Apolitical blogs combined. Transitioning now from infancy to a toddler?

Present day life is almost entirely governed by Politics in one form or other. At first sight it appears that two blogs titles are one too many and one alone suffices. After all,
arachnids weave two types of gossamer threads but tread only on one without getting entangled in the other! Authors are a stubborn lot and your budding blog-author Tarantula is no exception: desires to segregate political ones from not so political and hence the Apolitical blog too.

There is nothing in the world that pleases all; it is also true of these posts and some of them drew criticism. Healthy criticism is democratic and we shall honor and
agree to disagree.

Incidentally, this happens to be the 75th post (44th under
Apolitical and there are 31 in Political), which makes this a sort of Platinum posting!

Thanks a
zillion for the nourishment supplied by you in the form of encouragement.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Why Take a Donation?

Everyone knows that several parts of Pakistan are ravaged by unprecedented floods in the last few weeks. Several days ago India offered a relief of USD 10 million which was promptly rejected by its best neighbor. Our PM offered more and announced relief of USD 20 million and still Pakistan did not stretch its hand to take it and tried all sorts of methods to avoid taking relief. US went on record instructing Pak to accept the relief. At last, albeit reluctantly, Pak accepted the relief today and our benevolent PM duly offered yet another USD 20 million to Pakistan!

Many people fail to understand the reluctance of Pak in accepting monetary help from India. The fact is Pak has a massive industry to manufacture counterfeit currency of neighboring India’s Rupee Notes of higher denominations and of other advanced countries like US. This industry is so important to Pakistan’s economy which also helps in bridging the massive budgetary deficit of its home grown and military and govt. sponsored terrorist groups. This industry alone provides self-sufficiency to Pak like nothing else.

No wonder India and US failed to understand Pak’s hesitance. Pak’s perception is clear: why accept 20M USD when it can print 20B USD or its equivalent in INR in a single day by burning midnight oil?

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

C W G

Do you remember those twelve tasks we read as children and in particular Hercules' (Heracles) Fifth Labor, the one involved in cleaning the filthy Augean stables in a single day? It is indeed gratifying to note that both Hercule Poirot and Asterix found it worthy to emulate twelve tasks in their own special ways. It was a humanly impossible task to clean accumulated filth in a day. Instead of employing a shovel and a basket, our childhood hero diverted two rivers through the stable yard and got the job done without getting dirty. I wonder what he will do if he were given an assignment to clean the present day filth accumulated in the form of corruption related to forthcoming Commonwealth Games in Delhi.

One corporate brags: Impossible is Nothing. For us in India corruption is nothing. Also, nothing is nothing! It is part and parcel of our daily existence and we draw our sustenance only through the media of corruption. But for the British Queen who made a big fuss, we would have ignored CWG corruption since we are all familiar with countless Olympic size corruptions. Queen being a Queen, has the prerogative of getting furious over allegations of corruption involving Commonwealth Games. How can a common man afford to get furious? Even a Prime Minister can not get furious. Couple of days back our beloved Prime Minister went on to inspect CWG venues and was spell bound at the beauty of stadia and paid accolades to them. Alas I am no Keats; otherwise I would have penned few poems.

Hercules needed two rivers to clean the stables. We have only one River Yamuna near the CWG venues stinking of corruption, not to mention the NCR. With only one River flowing by, he can do precious little. We are running short of time. The best that can still be done under the circumstances is to hold CWG as per the original schedule by stepping on the pedal, change gears and speed up the processes and focus only on CWG i.e., Corruption Without any Games.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Indian Common Man – 2010 and Vote of Thanks

The media miserably failed in driving the importance of once in a lifetime mega event which took place in the city of Hyderabad (Deccan) during this month of August 2010. Common men knew virtually nothing about it. This is an indication of the poverty of our media (which comprises of few hundred TV channels and some dozens of daily newspapers) and their lopsided priorities. For our Fourth Estate and its visual equivalent, covering an event means publishing the photo of the dignitary formally inaugurating the event but not the event itself! Neither the prizewinners nor their life time work seems to matter, let alone other distinguished speakers.

Nearly six months back yours truly offered a National news paper and another City based one, to send out on weekly basis, brief notes on the works of young mathematicians world over (with an admittedly intended bias towards those of Indian origin) primarily to reach out the young readers and make a feeble attempt to influence them to pursue the path of mathematics. Our media felt such coverage is totally unwarranted and did not respond!

In one of the earlier blog posts, Tarantula wished Anand a score of 38-2-0 or better and it is indeed gratifying to note that Anand scored 39-1-0.

We all need to express our gratitude to TRS activists for having resumed their activities only on the day after the formal conclusion of the event.

We need to express our gratitude to Kapil Sibal et. al. for adding some life and spice to the lack luster news coverage by way of asking a four time world champion to prove his national identity which was not apparent to Indian bureaucracy! G. K. Chesterton wrote in an essay “…will call a spade a spade; but only when it is a grave-digger's spade” which is true of most of us on most occasions but not when it comes to Prof. Rajat Tandon. Can someone clarify whether our HRD Ministry recognizes a PhD from Yale? I sincerely hope Sibal does not start digging. On the otherwise insipid cake presented by the media, Sibal's is definitely a tasty icing.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

An Hour of Imprisonment per Murder

"What's in a name? That which we call a murder
By any other name would disgust as much."


Shakespeare would have surely said something akin to that; that is, if he were alive in December 1984. Whatever be the legal terminology, the fact remains that a murder is a murder is a murder irrespective of the the name given to confuse ordinary people.

Over a generation back, to be more precise, around midnight on the intervening night of December 2–3, 1984 a man-made tragedy struck. Over 16,000 lost lives, some immediately and others in following weeks, as a result of release of methyl isocyanate (MIC) gas and other toxins, resulting in the exposure of over 500,000 people. State government estimates are much lower, as normally is the case in India, and its figures can not be relied upon. The actual tragedy is more gruesome than what mere numbers can tell. Most of the money meant for relief of victims has gone onto the pockets of politicians, babus, lawyers and middlemen; hundreds of thousands continue to lead miserable lives which is perhaps worse than death and the effect may continue for some generations, hopefully with diminishing intensity.

Indian judicial system is designed around the ancient concept of kshama (Sanskrit: "patience; forbearance and pardon"); albeit in a completely messed up manner. It is kshama given to convicts at the expense of their victims and victimizing the victims further.

This trial took 19 judges to preside over the case in good 26 years. The judgment which came very late gave punishment of two years imprisonment to surviving seven of the eight convicts. This works out to an hour of imprisionment for every murder and completely absolved for leaving a million or two as living dead. UCIL got fined by Rupees five lakhs (around USD 10,000) which is perhaps much smaller than their accounting rounding off error! This is some judgment!

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Abha R.


From the times immemorial there is hardly any girl born and brought up in India who was not taught the stories of Savitri and Satyavan, Arundhati and Vasishtha, Damayanti and Nala and so on with the emphasis on the female member of those famous couples. There is hardly any need to recapitulate the significance of these women in Indian mythology and their impact on Indian society. There are numerous pairs in non-Indian mythologies like Romeo-Juliet, Laila-Majnu, Shirin-Farhad and so on who are internationally recognized tragic lovers. Unlike these tragic women, aforesaid Indian women set an eternal example to the entire womanhood and give a meaning to their very existence!


The entire episode of Ruchika Girhotra which lasted two decades is a saga of triumph of evil over good, smirking face over sad faces, powerful people over innocent, two year imprisonment over death by suicide and a family implicated in false cases.


The entire nation is glued to the news coverage by media and had a sigh of relief when the court verdict increasing the punishment to Shambhu Pratap Singh Rathore to two years of imprisonment, which came recently, which is of course subject to his appeals to the higher courts. Justice prevailed at last? India felt as though it has won a World War against injustice and also swept all the medals in Olympics.

Everyone missed out on the role of Abha Rathore. She stood by her husband like Savitri, Arundhati and Damayanti combined, a three-in-one. She proved herself no less than this troika of virtuous women from epics. She stood by her husband in good and not-so-good times; fought by his side, being a lawyer-cum-wife, knowing fully well that her husband is not an epitome of good character. This is what the girls were taught as their duty when they get married. After all, it is a known rule that at any given point of time at least half the lawyers are supposed to fight on the side of evil. If wife does not fight on behalf of an evil husband, who else will?

It is neither a right thing to rewrite epics nor easy, but there is nothing wrong in appending a modern epilogue by adding a chapter, for the education of girls of present and future generations, on SPS-Abha.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Teenagers Graduating to Adult Games

Abductions, rapes, murders, shoot-outs, blackmails, deploying hired assassins etc. etc. are all familiar adult sports, world over, until the end of second millennium. Acid throwing, eve teasing, ragging and such others were primary games played by teenagers, particularly in the countries like India. Readers of international, national and local news cannot fail to notice that such sports are no longer confined to the adults or teenagers respectively. Age barriers have melted down. Lot of teenagers are catching up with adults and have been acquiring the necessary skill-set and perfecting them, perhaps with an intention of making it their trade as they grow up and make a niche place for themselves in the society. Surely, the big and small screens (also the smaller ones on desktop/laptop and mobile screens) have immensely contributed to the learning process involved in it. A fait accompli?.

It is certainly an alarming trend to note that many kids who are below the teen-age bracket have started practicing these teenage and adult games with impunity and with significant success. It is difficult for the analysts, sociologists and criminologists to understand whether it is due to:

a) Children are growing up faster than ever before b) aforesaid screen based media has been imparting more education than necessary c) it is a paradigm shift brought in by the third millennium d) factors, which are yet to be identified, or e) a combination of all these factors, which is here to stay.


All the common people in our society including you and me, moralists, social workers, politicians, lawmakers, law-enforcers are all busy playing the games appropriate to their age and social hierarchy. None has time to notice these nascent visible trends let alone take measures to reverse them.

As civilization progresses, we cannot retard the advancement of the people and the society. There is precious little we can do to make people play games, according to the prevailing age groups. However, not all is lost. We can redefine age groups based on the games people play in contemporary society and remove the anomaly. The solution lies in bringing in a legislation and make a constitutional amendment to redefine the age groups in line with current realities so that broadly people fall into the age groups based on the games they play, at least for some more time. This might restore the social order to a reasonable level. Let us trust that such a move gets the wholehearted support of the elected representatives of both the houses of Parliament.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Champion’s Champion

In the world of Sports, Champions come and go every year. A Champion of Champions alone makes a lasting impression. Neither an Icelandic volcano nor an unscalable Bulgarian mountain summit called Veselin Topalov could stop one made of sterner stuff. The Champion stands tall among champions.

Topalov is not a chess player to be trifled with. He is Houdini of Chess in difficult situations, a great escape artist. He is an outstanding player of our times known for his ability to discover a winning line in an apparently drawn position and his opponents respect him for what he is capable of doing at the board of 64 square game. He is one of the few players in Chess history with 2800+ ELO rating.

Anand comes with the handicap like most Indian prodigies. India prides itself in nipping its talent in its bud. Indians, as a rule, do not get the same type of governmental and organizational support, which Russian, Chinese and several other European child prodigies get. What makes Anand different from others is he made a place for himself with his genius and humility, parental support and some nominal corporate support. Spain treats him as its son-of-the-soil. He locked horns with Bulgarian in Bulgaria to triumph and prove all pundits wrong.

The Chess is no longer what it used to be; it has changed dramatically as no other sport in last two decades. Now the Chess Championship matches are not mere three-week long chain of games. They are full-fledged world wars not even battles. Starting with Spassky vs. Fischer match, which is a war between two super-powers to prove their hegemony where the players were mere pawns of immense talent, gradually Chess Championships have become Wars of Science and Technology thrown in. These players spend anywhere from 6 months to 1 year to prepare for World Championship match, assisted by a battery of chess talent known as seconds. The winner is the one who is able to execute the plan most precisely in the tension ridden silent playing hall over a three-week long duration. With the advent of super-computers, database of virtually complete set games played till date and being played at any given moment, (the record of which is, of course, available), numerous knowledge-based tools to analyze the games, one can not afford to play a game (or unaware), at highest level, or a line which is already known. Every single game needs innovation, a new approach and variation and of course, an element of surprise.

The overall Championship Plan does not stop with planning the lines of chess games, it goes beyond; Game Theory, Psychology, Guerilla Warfare (ambush), counter-guerilla warfare (anticipation, contingency planning) etc. also come into play. Among all sports, there is not any sport, which is more taxing than Chess at its highest level. It is a truly open sport where a five year old girl novice can take on a nonagenarian former world (male) chess champion.

Sadly, Chess, not being a hit-and-run street game, may not become a national sport or a popular one in the country of its origin in near future.

Chess talent is waiting in the wings to take the mantle forward from ageing Anand. Inevitably, it is a matter of some more years. Yet, Anand is bound to be remembered as one of the greatest sports personalities of all time in the world of sports, by discerning few.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

What is not a Fake?

As per RBI, some of the currency in circulation in the denominations of Rs. 1,000 and 500 are fake and they are called counterfeit.

The stamp paper you buy for registering a property or for some legal purpose may also be a fake.

The Nobel Prize medal of Tagore kept in a museum got stolen and the one displayed is a replacement.

The boundaries of mines owned by mining magnets, on their own, get extended.

The boundaries of nations are disputed.

Someone who poses as CBI or ACB or police official is an impostor.

Diplomat with IFS tag could be a spy.

The certificates produced by politicians, prospective govt. employees and students indicate caste depending on the reservation made against it. The reason why some politicians are against 33% reservation for women is that it is somewhat more difficult, but not entirely impossible, to fake their sex.

University selling a degree may be non-existing, apart from being a doomed one.

Most of the beggars are not poor. They beg since it is an easy way out.

The infants carried by begging women are not theirs; they are hired at the current ruling rates of Rs. 125 to 175 per day. Their working day may have fewer working hours; perhaps till the next feed time of the infant.

Lady giving birth to a child of some other biological couple is a surrogate mother.

The medicines you buy might have expired and got relabeled; and with a good probability, may also be fake and they are known as spurious.

The doctor you visit may be armed with a degree and registration certificate purchased at a street corner in Bangalore and practicing illegally.

The weights used by vendors are not certified for correct weight (they are manufactured with a lesser weight so that govt. authorities can add suitable quantity of lead and certify for the correct weight with their seal); they are underweight and the liquid measures will have dents!

The meters in autos and taxis, including the electronic ones, display excess fare and they are tampered.

The meters in Petrol bunks read higher liters and rupees and they are also tampered apart from the fact that the Petrol is adulterated.

The tickets sold outside a cinema hall have a color called black.

The people encircling you near Regional Passport Office / Regional Transport Office or a monument are not employees or guides; they are touts.

Person selling you a plot of land may not be its owner.

For a failed internet based transaction, you may get back refund of transaction value in due course abut not the tax, service charge and the cess paid on the transaction value. Shall we call it a tax on non-transaction?

The news of police encounters with terrorists or military with enemies you read in papers are well articulated.

The goods you buy in Parry’s Corner is smuggled.

The Rolex you may dare to buy could be a replica.

In this world full of fakes, we should be happy that our politicians are genuine.

Last but not the least; the name of your blogger is not Tarantula. It is only his pseudonym!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Sinister Spinster

Recall Miss Marple, a fictional creation of Agatha Christie, without whom the English literature would have been poorer by some ten novels and few stories. This elegant armchair spinster detective has a charm of her own and endowed with the intricate knowledge of rural people and their psychology, which invariably proved helpful to the Scotland Yard in solving the cases in and around her area.

We have numerous female spies, both blonde and brunette, created by Ian Fleming and almost all ended up with providing much needed succor to the tired body of our beloved 007 at the end of the day!

In the exotic world of detectives and spies, our own Madhuri Gupta, a spinster, is a class by herself. Until the other day, no one suspected her to be an international spy. She has IFS tag, also works as a junior diplomatic official in the Ministry of External Affairs. Some complain that she is not in the same league as Mata Hari and Virginia Hall. Tarantula does not approve any such remarks, which are, obviously, made with superficial knowledge of the extent of her activities.

Admittedly, it is difficult to understand her motives behind sharing of information with our neighbor. May be she strongly felt that RTI Act should be extended to brothers beyond the unnatural boundaries made by partitioning the country and started acting on this impulse. As readers are aware, India takes few decades to decide on the punishment, if any, but certainly GoP might not take as many days in awarding Madhuri Gupta their hightest civilian honor Nishan-e-Pakistan.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Nature’s Gifts – Not for Us

Air is polluted by industries and poisoned by politician’s speeches; one has no option but to breathe, until his/her last breath. Era of buying fresh air has dawned. Go; buy a can of it, if you can.

Water is mixed with sewerage and industrial effluents. If you have a tenner or more, buy a litre and litter the earth with PET bottle. Remember, our Babus do not drink municipality-supplied drinking water.

Land is needed to build a hut to live? Shell out your life’s savings to buy in retail from land sharks or Dinakarans who grab it in hundreds of acres at a time, free of cost.

Mineral Resources are meant for few people to mine away, never mind legally or otherwise, and bribe politicians and Babus en-route to amassing thousands of crores.

Forest Wealth is for brigands, forest officials and politicians; we have no right to enjoy even the indirect benefits of forestry as they are indiscriminately cut down.

Bandwidth Spectrum is least understood of the natural resources and handful of people own it as they paid thousands of crores as auction price and bribes. Pay to use a negligible fraction of it.

Rains Feel like getting drenched and dancing in the first rains of monsoon? Beware, now it is highly acidic.

Vegetables and Fruits come with a pinch of pesticides and fertilizer residues. You have an option of GM/BT varieties together with not so well established consequences.

SOON TO COME

Sunlight, if used in lieu of erratic and expensive electricity may become taxable in one of the forthcoming budgets.

Moonlight or Scenic Beauty may be enjoyed in future by paying ‘enjoyment tax’.

ALREADY EXTINCT

Sounds of Chirping Birds are only available in recorded versions as most birds are on fast track of extinction.