Ideas from Nature

Ardent admirers of Mother Nature are naïve in some ways. For them, all developments made by homo sapiens have their roots in nature, be it discoveries, inventions, artistic form of expressions like dances, music and so on, sciences and technologies including. At first glance, many examples which readily come to mind appear to strengthen such a view.

Beaver must have given the ideas to build dams; birds must have hardened the human dreams to fly and fish for swimming; fire flies gave idea for lights; serpents and jackals have become a basis to start a class of unique people called politicians; peacock must have given inspiration for dance and some other birds for singing; brilliant scenery made him to capture it on canvas. Bees and ants must have given ideas of forming social systems. Several living creatures must have given early teachings on collective living to human beings. Some birds have given ideas to migrate to other continents. Apple is known to have played a major role in understanding gravity. Bird nests might have given ideas to build early homes; squirrels have given the ideas of warehouses for food storage and rodents gave ideas for tunnels. Examples galore.

Such views look like an expression of rhapsody on nature. That, by no means implies that man had not made any original contributions on his own without leaning on nature for inspiration or catalysts for ideas. Far from it. For instance, the entire technology of spiraling prices is brilliantly conceived by human mind. Many a nation have thrived on early use of such technologies and flourished and many other doomed as well due to consequent runaway inflations and associated manmade disasters. It is worthy to note that one technology derived inspiration from this man-made one and develops space vehicles that go faster than the escape velocity of planets is space technology!

UIGAC ®

To err is human. We all know that. So is: to sin is more human. Few centuries back there flourished a certain theological institution which permitted any sinner to make confession in a recognized place of worship, draw a cheque for the prescribed sum i.e., not less than the tariff fixed commensurate to the gravity of the offence and carefully put in the drop-box kept aside for the purpose and get absolved through His representative. This system had its virtues. One could murder neighbor or adversary or anyone for that matter – not just one, more if need be – and get His complete absolution on no questions asked basis, get a clean chit from High (note capital h) command, keep head high and live in society, sleep like a baby in the night with ones soul at complete peace with itself.

Extinction of such a wonderful system, or absence of its equivalent, is more acutely felt in today’s society than at any other point in human history. People can manage clean chits from party high command, have the cases withdrawn by CBI in Supreme Court, and ensure that judge uncles rule (for more details read Supreme Court’s remarks on Allahabad High Court made on 26th Oct 2010) in their favor with little or no punishment, get Rathore style smirk back on face, and get respect (!) back from society as though nothing happened but not the baby-like-sleep since the silly thing called conscience still pricks. Offerings like diamond studded golden crown weighing a ton to Lord Balaji coupled with daily dose of sedative pills before going to bed provide no real solace but they do make an avoidable hole in the pocket.

In the aforesaid context, it makes immense business sense to start a Universal Institution to Grant Absolution Certificates and Tarantula is intending to open shortly. All the sinners are encouraged to send their non-refundable remittances directly to the Swiss account of UIGAC® by obtaining the tariffs and bank code for remittances and obtain soft copy of the certificate through 1024-byte state-of-the-art encryption system. All Pakistan printed counterfeit certificates are invalid in His land. Short payments made by incomplete confession are invalid. For example, once a Raja or Raju makes full confessional payment, his kith and kin can enjoy the loot as though it is earned properly in His eyes. Our Certificates are designed for lamination at sinner’s end and can be conveniently kept below the pillow at the time of sleeping. Stolen or Xerox or multiple copies of certificates are invalid. You may note that UIGAC has no braches or representatives in any part of this Universe. Taxes as applicable and other T&C apply.

Those unfortunate few who are yet to sin may send their c.v. for few vacant positions on the board of UIGAC.

Never Too Late

Shri Bholaram Das of Assam made a splash on 16th October 2010 by announcing his enrolment for PhD program in Gauhati University on his 99th Birthday i.e., 100th year of his existence. One of his grand-daughters is going to be his thesis advisor. There is more than one lesson in this communique. Age is no bar for learning though it does not necessarily mean that one should procrastinate basic learning forever. Next lesson is that it does not really matter from whom you learn; at least age-wise i.e., whether it is from someone of grandchild’s age or great-grandchild’s.

From now on, all application forms need to be reprinted to have three boxes to fill-in age as against the current practice of two boxes. In an age where phone numbers are going to become 11 digit long as against present 10 digits and IPv4 IP addresses are being replaced by IPv6, this should have been anticipated. But, that is a minor irritant, to be frank.

In cricketing parlance, nervous nineties is a well known phenomenon. Now that Shri Bholaram is past 99, he need not be nervous at all and during his learning, play his natural game.

Suresh Kalmadi

It is time for all Indians to unite and stand by Suresh Kalmadi on the eve of CWG-2010. He had done a yeomen service to the nation and that needs immediate recognition. All the criticism which is being heaped on him is totally unfair.


Kalmadi is an Indian first. He had a great vision to make India sweep all the medals at CWG without leaving even a single bronze to other countries, possibly without inaugurating the games. He had been planning it for several years and executing with gusto.

Most people from so-called developing nations lack the wonderful immune system we Indians possess. We are immune to anything and everything. Other nations realized their handicap. They are jealous. They cry foul about the conditions in Games village, floods, dengue, falling structures, security and anticipated nation wide riots on or after 24th September 2010 and so on. If they have no such grandiose situations back at their homes, how can India be held responsible?

Has anyone heard of Olympics getting conducted in the Clean Rooms of Silicon Valley? Little bit of dust, aroma and other things will certainly enrich the sporting experience. In the ancient Olympic Games village in Greece there is no evidence of any Glamour Room. Why should we have them in CWG village? Aren’t there enough open spaces in and around CWG village? Man is a product of nature and it is time he comes out of ivory towers and glass houses to freely commune with nature and become an integral part of it.

Well done, Suresh Kalmadi! Keep it up. Ignore your detractors. Aim for Olympics now and make India sweep all medals and take it to Olympic Heights.

Happy Birthday

Coming from an area that has one of the highest infant mortality rates in the world, your Tarantula has every reason to celebrate its one year of survival so far, having announced arrival on blogosphere on 23 September 2009 at 22.30 IST. It happens to be an Equinox day. Does is portend anything? This is 75th baby step in the form of posts in both the Political and Apolitical blogs combined. Transitioning now from infancy to a toddler?

Present day life is almost entirely governed by Politics in one form or other. At first sight it appears that two blogs titles are one too many and one alone suffices. After all, arachnids weave two types of gossamer threads but tread only on one without getting entangled in the other! Authors are a stubborn lot and your budding blog-author Tarantula is no exception: desires to segregate political ones from not so political and hence the Apolitical blog too.

There is nothing in the world that pleases all; it is also true of these posts and some of them drew criticism. Healthy criticism is democratic and we shall honor and agree to disagree.

Incidentally, this happens to be the 75th post (44th under Apolitical and there are 31 in Political), which makes this a sort of Platinum posting!

Thanks a zillion for the nourishment supplied by you in the form of encouragement.

Why Take a Donation?

Everyone knows that several parts of Pakistan are ravaged by unprecedented floods in the last few weeks. Several days ago India offered a relief of USD 10 million which was promptly rejected by its best neighbor. Our PM offered more and announced relief of USD 20 million and still Pakistan did not stretch its hand to take it and tried all sorts of methods to avoid taking relief. US went on record instructing Pak to accept the relief. At last, albeit reluctantly, Pak accepted the relief today and our benevolent PM duly offered yet another USD 20 million to Pakistan!

Many people fail to understand the reluctance of Pak in accepting monetary help from India. The fact is Pak has a massive industry to manufacture counterfeit currency of neighboring India’s Rupee Notes of higher denominations and of other advanced countries like US. This industry is so important to Pakistan’s economy which also helps in bridging the massive budgetary deficit of its home grown and military and govt. sponsored terrorist groups. This industry alone provides self-sufficiency to Pak like nothing else.

No wonder India and US failed to understand Pak’s hesitance. Pak’s perception is clear: why accept 20M USD when it can print 20B USD or its equivalent in INR in a single day by burning midnight oil?

C W G

Do you remember those twelve tasks we read as children and in particular Hercules' (Heracles) Fifth Labor, the one involved in cleaning the filthy Augean stables in a single day? It is indeed gratifying to note that both Hercule Poirot and Asterix found it worthy to emulate twelve tasks in their own special ways. It was a humanly impossible task to clean accumulated filth in a day. Instead of employing a shovel and a basket, our childhood hero diverted two rivers through the stable yard and got the job done without getting dirty. I wonder what he will do if he were given an assignment to clean the present day filth accumulated in the form of corruption related to forthcoming Commonwealth Games in Delhi.

One corporate brags: Impossible is Nothing. For us in India corruption is nothing. Also, nothing is nothing! It is part and parcel of our daily existence and we draw our sustenance only through the media of corruption. But for the British Queen who made a big fuss, we would have ignored CWG corruption since we are all familiar with countless Olympic size corruptions. Queen being a Queen, has the prerogative of getting furious over allegations of corruption involving Commonwealth Games. How can a common man afford to get furious? Even a Prime Minister can not get furious. Couple of days back our beloved Prime Minister went on to inspect CWG venues and was spell bound at the beauty of stadia and paid accolades to them. Alas I am no Keats; otherwise I would have penned few poems.

Hercules needed two rivers to clean the stables. We have only one River Yamuna near the CWG venues stinking of corruption, not to mention the NCR. With only one River flowing by, he can do precious little. We are running short of time. The best that can still be done under the circumstances is to hold CWG as per the original schedule by stepping on the pedal, change gears and speed up the processes and focus only on CWG i.e., Corruption Without any Games.

Indian Common Man – 2010 and Vote of Thanks

The media miserably failed in driving the importance of once in a lifetime mega event which took place in the city of Hyderabad (Deccan) during this month of August 2010. Common men knew virtually nothing about it. This is an indication of the poverty of our media (which comprises of few hundred TV channels and some dozens of daily newspapers) and their lopsided priorities. For our Fourth Estate and its visual equivalent, covering an event means publishing the photo of the dignitary formally inaugurating the event but not the event itself! Neither the prizewinners nor their life time work seems to matter, let alone other distinguished speakers.

Nearly six months back yours truly offered a National news paper and another City based one, to send out on weekly basis, brief notes on the works of young mathematicians world over (with an admittedly intended bias towards those of Indian origin) primarily to reach out the young readers and make a feeble attempt to influence them to pursue the path of mathematics. Our media felt such coverage is totally unwarranted and did not respond!

In one of the earlier blog posts, Tarantula wished Anand a score of 38-2-0 or better and it is indeed gratifying to note that Anand scored 39-1-0.

We all need to express our gratitude to TRS activists for having resumed their activities only on the day after the formal conclusion of the event.

We need to express our gratitude to Kapil Sibal et. al. for adding some life and spice to the lack luster news coverage by way of asking a four time world champion to prove his national identity which was not apparent to Indian bureaucracy! G. K. Chesterton wrote in an essay “…will call a spade a spade; but only when it is a grave-digger's spade” which is true of most of us on most occasions but not when it comes to Prof. Rajat Tandon. Can someone clarify whether our HRD Ministry recognizes a PhD from Yale? I sincerely hope Sibal does not start digging. On the otherwise insipid cake presented by the media, Sibal's is definitely a tasty icing.

An Hour of Imprisonment per Murder

"What's in a name? That which we call a murder
By any other name would disgust as much."

Shakespeare would have surely said something akin to that; that is, if he were alive in December 1984. Whatever be the legal terminology, the fact remains that a murder is a murder is a murder irrespective of the the name given to confuse ordinary people.

Over a generation back, to be more precise, around midnight on the intervening night of December 2–3, 1984 a man-made tragedy struck. Over 16,000 lost lives, some immediately and others in following weeks, as a result of release of methyl isocyanate (MIC) gas and other toxins, resulting in the exposure of over 500,000 people. State government estimates are much lower, as normally is the case in India, and its figures can not be relied upon. The actual tragedy is more gruesome than what mere numbers can tell. Most of the money meant for relief of victims has gone onto the pockets of politicians, babus, lawyers and middlemen; hundreds of thousands continue to lead miserable lives which is perhaps worse than death and the effect may continue for some generations, hopefully with diminishing intensity.

Indian judicial system is designed around the ancient concept of kshama (Sanskrit: "patience; forbearance and pardon"); albeit in a completely messed up manner. It is kshama given to convicts at the expense of their victims and victimizing the victims further.

This trial took 19 judges to preside over the case in good 26 years. The judgment which came very late gave punishment of two years imprisonment to surviving seven of the eight convicts. This works out to an hour of imprisionment for every murder and completely absolved for leaving a million or two as living dead. UCIL got fined by Rupees five lakhs (around USD 10,000) which is perhaps much smaller than their accounting rounding off error! This is some judgment!

Abha R.

From the times immemorial there is hardly any girl born and brought up in India who was not taught the stories of Savitri and Satyavan, Arundhati and Vasishtha, Damayanti and Nala and so on with the emphasis on the female member of those famous couples. There is hardly any need to recapitulate the significance of these women in Indian mythology and their impact on Indian society. There are numerous pairs in non-Indian mythologies like Romeo-Juliet, Laila-Majnu, Shirin-Farhad and so on who are internationally recognized tragic lovers. Unlike these tragic women, aforesaid Indian women set an eternal example to the entire womanhood and give a meaning to their very existence!


The entire episode of Ruchika Girhotra which lasted two decades is a saga of triumph of evil over good, smirking face over sad faces, powerful people over innocent, two year imprisonment over death by suicide and a family implicated in false cases.


The entire nation is glued to the news coverage by media and had a sigh of relief when the court verdict increasing the punishment to Shambhu Pratap Singh Rathore to two years of imprisonment, which came recently, which is of course subject to his appeals to the higher courts. Justice prevailed at last? India felt as though it has won a World War against injustice and also swept all the medals in Olympics.

Everyone missed out on the role of Abha Rathore. She stood by her husband like Savitri, Arundhati and Damayanti combined, a three-in-one. She proved herself no less than this troika of virtuous women from epics. She stood by her husband in good and not-so-good times; fought by his side, being a lawyer-cum-wife, knowing fully well that her husband is not an epitome of good character. This is what the girls were taught as their duty when they get married. After all, it is a known rule that at any given point of time at least half the lawyers are supposed to fight on the side of evil. If wife does not fight on behalf of an evil husband, who else will?

It is neither a right thing to rewrite epics nor easy, but there is nothing wrong in appending a modern epilogue by adding a chapter, for the education of girls of present and future generations, on SPS-Abha.